so, these two pictures were in a vain attempt to show a picture of myself and the kiddies toboganning... oh well, i guess now my job for the evening is to go and name all the pictures i have failed to name....

so, the idea behind the toboganning picture, if we could all just imagine that one there, is that my most peaceful moments in life... i was going to list them...

1) sea-dooing on the lake for the whole day - the feeling of being out on the water

2) being out in the snow with my boys - ski-dooing or toboganning

3) laying on a blanket on the grass - while the boys are playing in the sandbox

4) having a coffee while reading 'house and home' magazine

5) i saved the best for last - snuggling on the couch - not by myself of course!!! (that probably made my brother think that he's never going to read my blog again)

these are my moments of peace and i try desperately to have more and more of them - i really feel like life has become a competition to see who can do more and be busier... and i officially am rejecting this as a bad idea and attempting to put my moments of peace a priority

.... that is, right after i spend three hours naming pictures... cuz i really need to get that done!!

so, finally, finally, finally i have published a picture on my blog - this is cause for celebration!! i thought i'd put one on of me and the hubby.... taking a picture of ourselves - i wonder where all our friends were???

i do have to say that this picture thing now opens a whole new avenue for my writing on the blog - so much more can be told through a picture than words, correct???

so, here is my new table, which i recently wrote about jason shopping for wood for this.... the picture was supposed to show up after this, but i'm not very good at this i guess...

well, i do have one more to show, but it'll have to come in a seperate post... hope the pictures really add to this exciting diary of mine!!!

men and wood...

jason just took the boys on a venture to kindersly - sort of a 'right of passage' as they say - to shop for wood... they are going to the lumber yard, with a pad of paper, a pencil, and a tape measurer, and jason is going to show them the ageless art form of purchasing wood...

i believe it starts with smelling the wood, then touching it, holding it up to one's eye and looking at the levelness of the wood, and then lastly, doing some 'figuring' in one's head (and then purchasing triple of what they need)

but if more is bought than necessary, this is not a bad thing, as jason has a 'wood pile' in the quanset that he has been adding to for seven years now... i am not allowed to sort it, use any of it, or throw any of it away, as a man needs his wood pile to remain untouched...

i'm sure the boys will come back 'men' after this momentous event with their father... and probably annoy their future wives some day with wood piles of their own...

***note: jason is making me a table, so my mocking of him will stop here...

in my life lately...

well, first of all, jason and i had a great trip to pittsburgh - apart from the crazy flight in during a big wind storm, it was lots of fun... highlight was when we got to watch the steelers entire 2 hour warm up sitting front row in the stadium.

we also got to see the penguins play and ate some excellent perogies and had an awesome hotel, so it was all great.

i was happy to see some other couples in our hotel, doing the same thing as us, so i know i'm not crazy for liking football - it's amazing the difference between here and there as far as women watching sports on tv and enjoying it... everywhere i went there was women talking about the 'college games' that were happening over the weekend - i thought we lived and breathed hockey here, but not nearly what it's like for football there.

also, brandon has now scored THREE goals in four games of hockey - his first goal was in kindersly and it was embarrassing cuz i started crying when he got it - and not just a little cry, but a bawling, kinda ugly cry....

i'm completely enjoying my favorite time of year - that being the christmas holidays - and did get to see the new bond movie, which always puts me in the mood for... Christmas!!! yes, i remember watching bond movies with my dad and it's such a great memory and i love bond!!!

jason and i are still married - although all this time together certianly isn't helping anything!!! (don't think i'm so horrible, he would tell you the same thing) no, we're slowly getting used to seeing each other again - at least for longer than an hour a day...

and brandon and ethan just performed in their sunday school program at church, or should i say ethan cried and brandon got embarrassed... good times and memories for both (ethan also cried when we took him to sit on santa's lap - these are the memories we like him to have of christmas)

enough with the essay i guess - i still can't figure out the pictures... next time maybe

the big chill sets in....

well, here comes winter - i was just browsing the weather and it's looking nice and crazy cold for the next while here... this leads me to announce that it is only 6 more days until jason and i leave this ice cold climate for the tropical paradise of pittsburgh!!!!

ah, yes, pittsburgh - where we will come back from with a tan for sure - my brother did tell me that we are the only people he knew that would do their winter vacation in pittsburgh.

we also are going the vanier cup in saskatoon tomorrow - in minus 25 and possibility of flurries - just a little warm up for the steelers game i'm thinking...

so, being the freak that i am, i have now started my plans for pittsburgh, mapping possible routes, planning the days down to the minute - i'm sure jason will try to hide these plans before we leave.

i have the house all decorated for christmas, my christmas 'letter' almost ready, and holiday baking on its way - just want to be ready for my return home and be fully in the holiday spirit....

which leads me to say, that my husband really wants to be american... he just loves american thanksgiving - enough that he expected turkey and stuffing yesterday - and he thought we should be shopping today (as it is the biggest shopping day of the year, correct???)

brandon's first hockey game is sunday - and i'm sure that will cause me to blog more at that time... ethan has a sign made up to take to the game - it must be nice to have a number one fan (i know my mom was mine, just not quite the same thing as a sibling, or boyfriend, or even a creepy fan)

well, off to a hockey game tonight - in the bitter cold - we should all just stay at home and hibernate....

puke and the sun...

so, i'm all excited because i had seven comments on my blog, and then realized that one friend left five of them and another, two... so really, it's only two comments...

for all of those slacker friends of mine that read this and don't comment - i have nothing to say to you!!!

well, two kids puking, now there's a good time. then, the sun hasn't shone in awhile and, oh-oh, the depression, i feel it coming...

so, i'm going to go outside, work my little behind off (and it is little, it's the belly and the hips that need the work) and hopefully come in all pumped up about life - that happens right???

they say when you are depressed, go work out, take some herbs (medicinal of course) and, what else tom cruise, do nice things for other people???

well, glenna still has not shown me how to post pictures, etc., so this blog is still as boring as ever...

see you all and hope i have more to talk about next time..

well, back to the blogging...
who doesn't love nfl football??? today brandon and i had a work session (jason thinks i need to be doing more intellectually for the boys) and so we went over all 32 teams, what divisions they are in and who we think will win each of the eight divisions.
good times.
we did have an excellent time in edmonton, going to the waterpark on saturday for the whole day. it did not excite me at all for when the boys are teenagers... just can't stand the teenagers.
and then there are the parents at the waterpark who come in, all decked out in their fancy swimwear and then they just let the kids go and sit down and read magazines and newspapers and talk on their cell phones the entire time. it costs 30 bucks to get in!!!! are you insane???
well, those are my thoughts for the day and i'm not going to blog again until i learn how to put pictures on.. so, glenna, you need to teach me.

so, i forgot how to find my own blog, so i put in crazy mom for an address and here i went to some other mom's blog and she was married to a military man in the states and her last entry was in 2003...

she wrote, 'they just announced we are going to war against sadam hussien... people are worried but the last time we went to war there it lasted 48 days, i'm betting this one no longer than 30'

wow, it was kinda wierd and sad to read.

so, today was the steelers first game and the opening day for NFL!!! so excited and i actually said, to myself, cuz no one is ever here, that I LOVE FOOTBALL. steelers won, beating the dolphins, and this was exciting.

ethan said, 'go busaburger go' and i said, 'ethan, ben rothlesburger is not playing, he's hurt' and then brandon looked at me and said, 'mom, the steelers are never going to win without jerome bettis or big ben... it's hopeless!!' i just love watching football with the boys.

so, i haven't done this in awhile, and i'm sure that my many, many readers have been waiting with anticipation to see what i come up with next...

ok, well, we're still farming, i'm cooking, cleaning, yelling and 'relaxing' in the evening. yap...

it was the start of school on wednesday and although brandon is not going to school, we all got back to school outfits, just to fit it, cuz if there is one thing i want to teach to my children, it is to do whatever the tv or adds in magazines tell you to do!!!!

we have five hired men this year, so i'm cooking for 6-7 men, every other night... but really enjoying it and just running around like mary poppins actually!!!

one of our hired men, recommended to me by a certain lady friend, is quite the entertainment out in the field and here. we unfortunately have two of them stay here overnight and that can lead to some pretty crazy conversations about catholic summer camp and coffee and pancakes!!!

this boy is sweet and nice, yet has been homeschooled and is lacking a few social graces... you really need to be the bully if you choose to homeschool your kid, you need to mock them and to laugh at them and let them know when they are not funny. anyways, he comes and sits with us in the evening in his buzz lightyear pjs and likes to tell everyone at work how to do their jobs.

today, for instance, two of the hired men were in a bin shoveling out the canola, and my father-in-law gave him a broom, with the idea of him going in the bin as well... he then decided to hide first behind the bin and then behing the semi, finally making eye contact with my father-in-law and then running over to the bin and jumping in... so strange the games these men play

well, as interesting as this has been for you all, i must sign off and go to watch a few episodes of arrested development, season three...

i promise the next blog will be more interesting!!! i promise!!

romantic evening with jason.... we leave our kids with the in-laws and were headed off to jason's hockey game in delisle. hoping for a nice bonding time of heartfelt conversation.

jason goes to the rink to pack up equipment, then is coming to pick me up. i get in the truck and sitting, completely squished in, are three men. yee-ha!!! now i have a two hour drive with 'Big B' (that name should say it all, but in case it doesn't, he's a three hundred pound guy who hauls pigs), Jim (65 years old and i've never heard him speak, even now) and the coach, Lynn (who just got a satellite road and all he wants was for Jason to turn the radio to maxim, howard stern, or raw dog comedy channel)

so this is great conversation for two hours and then the whole game i was dreading the two hours on the way home.

now, tell me, do i not have a romantic husband??? in all fairness, he just has a kind heart, unlike myself, and felt sorry for them and offered them a ride.

potatoe salad.... some just have to have it. well, my hubby is one of those who will eat it at all costs. and now, it has claimed him twice with 12 hour fits of very violent puking.... but the love affair lives on.

jason decided to not take a lunch i had so graciously offered to make him, 'because big boys don't take bag lunches to their hockey games', so instead he dove into a 23 day old sub from 7 eleven and some 'grey' potatoe salad. quite satisfied, he topped that off with some wings later on in the evening and then for the frosting on the cake, potatoe wedges dipped in ranch dressing.

he gets home from his game around 1:30 in the morning, and is just tossing and turning, trying his best to keep all that good nutrition in his belly. finally, the battle ends at 4:00 am and the whole house is woken up to what we all believe to be someone stabbing him to death. this continued, on the hour, every hour, until i took him at 5:00 the next evening to the hospital for a gravel needle. it had to be done, there was only so much puking i could listen too.

i do feel sorry for him though, cuz i was not very sympathetic, seeings how he did bring this on himself and forced me to take two kids to church by myself.

i also have concluded that men are horrible pukers.... they think truly that they are going to die, like puking alone has claimed millions of lives and they are next. he gets the usual 'i puked for three months with brandon and three months with ethan, don't even tell me you can't move!!!'

i know, you all feel sorry for jason and want to come and pamper him because he deserves better!!! i've heard it before, from the nurses at the hospital to everyone i know.... don't even tell me!!

afraid of the wind... anyone else? very, very afraid. both my boys are sick today, it's very windy, and jason is leaving tonight to play hockey... i'm already anticipating being afraid. i know, get over it, but this fear of wind has been with me ever since as a young gal i watched that horrible movie twister - brutal.

anyways, had a very exciting experience with my eldest, brandon, at his little 'canskate' practice. he skated by himself across the width of the rink!! very exciting.

i just had my first basketball practice yesterday - sr girls - and boy was it fun. and embarrassing. of course i'm like the fat mom there trying to run with the girls because i need to loose the baby fat. i would tell them to run say an eight (eight lengths of the gym) and i would jump in for the last four or two and they would all still beat me... after which i would yell at all of them " who here has had two babies? i didn't think so... i'll talk to you after you give up your body for two snotty nosed boys!!!" and then, during any drill if i was demonstrating something and messed up, i'd just say "two babies!!!" i'm sure they all don't think i'm pathetic. i just like to try to inspire in my coaching role!!

talk to you later...

if i could have my dream occupation (other than this dream that i'm living in as we speak!!)... definitely like a pastry chef or some sort of chef at a nice restaurant. love to bake. it's a little embarrassing because my only audience today was ethan and i had to bribe him with smarties to watch me bake. i put all the ingredients into little glass containers and then told him how to make the world's best oatmeal cookie!! he then started hitting me with a wooden spoon.

i also find that jason never can complement me enough on my baking or cooking!! poor jason... i know you are all thinking it. he and my brother ryan and brandon came home after watching a football game and i had clam chowder, carrot cake, cookies and surprise spread for them and jason might have said thank you twice... i told him ten times would be acceptable!! poor jason!

if i could have my dream occupation (other than this dream that i'm living in as we speak!!)... definitely like a pastry chef or some sort of chef at a nice restaurant. love to bake. it's a little embarrassing because my only audience today was ethan and i had to bribe him with smarties to watch me bake. i put all the ingredients into little glass containers and then told him how to make the world's best oatmeal cookie!! he then started hitting me with a wooden spoon.

i also find that jason never can complement me enough on my baking or cooking!! poor jason... i know you are all thinking it. he and my brother ryan and brandon came home after watching a football game and i had clam chowder, carrot cake, cookies and surprise spread for them and jason might have said thank you twice... i told him ten times would be acceptable!! poor jason!

ok, so jason went hunting the great 'moose' and i'm stuck at home with two boys for four days. and i'm still up at quarter to twelve, just putting the final 'touches' on my ladies meeting agenda for tomorrow night. yes, i'm the kelfield ladies group president... need i say more. we're doing the cs lewis book mere christianity - amazing. just reading about love being an act of the will, not a feeling, which is really good to read when your husband leaves you for a moose for four days.
so, my last blog (jacqui loves it when i say that word) was about how your past affects you so much, but i just learnt at sunday school today that "you are not a product of your past, but a product of Christ's work done for you on the cross" ok, so that means we need to start our thinking at the cross i guess.
i didn't feel like i'd win any awards on motherhood today - when jason was leaving church today to go hunting, i got like this panic attack, kinda started into a pretty horrible crying session, and quickly grabbed my kid's from my mother-in-law, bribing them both with halloween candy, and left the church bawling!! i'm sure that wasn't at all scary for my three year old and one year old boys!! oh well, i have to keep thinking that God gave me kids for a reason, not just as some cruel joke to show how inadiquate i am.
better go, this could be one ugly mother dropping her kid off at playschool in the morning. it's yellow day - very exciting, i'm thinking about putting on candice's bridesmaid dress to drop him off - i'll think a little more about that.
HOORAY FOR THE SAN DIEGO CHARGERS but boo for my poor PACKERS

when you live somewhere, no matter how big or small, i think you sorta start believing that your way of life is 'normal' or the right way, but it's always good to see other ways of life, get out of your own situation for awhile, so you can learn new things.
i went to three hills and calgary this weekend and, man, city life is different. just so many young people without kids and always on the go. staying at home for an entire day would probably send someone to the nut house, where i can stay home for 2-3 days without venturing out of my yard.
it was interesting though, because i do believe still that there is a difference between male and female - talking to my friend stacy - and it's undeniable that the way you are raised affects who you are, now matter what!!
women have been raised to see their dad's protecting and taking care of their moms and men have been raised seeing their dad's provide and protect. it's in your brain. BUT i do know that jason does alot of things he didn't grow up with, so change is possible, but it's just that, CHANGE. a man is not naturally going to clean up around the house or make a meal and a woman doesn't want to take the garabage out or scrape the windsheild or unclog the sewer. these things can change b/c jason does get up the kids in the night or change the odd diaper, but it hasn't happened naturally - only with nagging in the beginning!! it just made me think to not be upset that jason doesn't want to to "womanly' thinks naturally and to appreciate the change he's been willing to undergo.

well,
jason is finally done harvest - he might custom combine for a guy next week, but that's it. now he has a
ton of grain to get rid of.
so, he took the boys to the farm this morning and i get to have a coffee, some banana bread (i know, i used
to gag at the sight of a banana) and spend some time on the computer. nice.
i was watching oprah yesterday and there was the author of the book 'a million little pieces' which i now want
to read. oprah has a way of making you want to do what she is doing. this author was addicted to alcohol and
drugs and said that during his rehab he went with the motto 'hold on' he says that every addiction, whether it
be food, chemical, or alcohol, is emotional and that if you are feeling an emotion it will make you want a quick fix to make the emotion go away, but if you can just hold on through that emotion, you can conquer your addictions.
so mine is food - ya - and when i'm bored, lonely, thinking i either had a crappy day or a good day and wanting a reward - i go for the halloween candy or a pepsi (ya, it's pepsi now)
so now i'm trying to 'hold on' we'll see how that goes.
he also said that when he was little, he would watch his parents at parties and notice that when they drank, they would become happy - so he started to link drinking to being happy. makes me wonder how many little kids out there are recieving the wrong message - that drinking leads to happiness. kids can pick up on things like that at such a young age.
well, gotta go do some mom work - iron, vacuum, dust - and then reward myself with some halloween candy!!

brandon is going to be playing hockey this winter - we'll see how that goes. he is going to be on a pre-intitiation team (probably spelt that wrong) that is sorta like when your boyfriend gives you a pre-promise ring!!
anyways, we're pumped about it. i think it's a league where they tape a stick to their arm and they all push a chair around!
jason wants to fill our quanset up with water to make a rink... sounds like a foolproof idea to me.
ethan can throw a full size football up into the air and catch it... something i still struggle with.
well, i have to go cook a meal for the men in the field (me and martha)
i thought today, here i used to want to be a lawyer and now i clean, do laundry, cook, clean and nag. what has my life come too!?! they say that being a mom is the hardest job... it's because it's a constant battle to stay sane. jason says it's the highest calling a woman could have (he just wants me to make a good supper)
last night two hunters from utah stopped in... we live on a farm and no one 'stops in'... so of course i met them at the door with a gun. it's so wierd that just 6 years after being in college i am talking to hunters about duck and geese flight patterns and am showing off my husband's dead deer head while he is out killing another helpless animal that i will have to eat!! crazy what you will do when you fall helplessly in love.

my kids are insane!!!

ethan is my youngest and he has these big brown eyes that he knows how to use. we usually start the morning with him crying, then i try to bring him to my bed, then he usually hits me with his huge melon and we get up. then he throws most of his breakfast on the floor or hides it under his tray. the rest of the day is a struggle for power between him and I - and he is the one with the big brown eyes so you can guess who wins that battle.

today brandon was at a buddy's house and when i went to pick him up, he yelled at me, hid under a bench, ran away from the car, and then was crying so hard on the way home he threw up in the car. GREAT!! i put him in his bedroom and called jason at the farm and told him that when he got home, he had to think of a good punishment because i just wanted to strangle him!! i think the Lord was helping me to stay calm and not go into the room! i was so humiliated because every mom wants to think that they have things under control, but i don't and i fail and it's just a day by day journey i guess.

i was on the internet looking for hotels in vancouver to go and visit jason's sister angie and mike and their two kids, but then i got distracted by cruise vacations in the bahamas... oops!!

so long,...

ok... this is what jenny is doing and i wanted to be able to comment on her blog, so i had to open one and here it is. i thought i'd try it, but the last successful diary i had was when i was dating jason and that is just so embarrassing that i don't know why i am doing this.
something on my mind over thanksgiving and during harvest here is everyone thinks that they are the busiest person on the earth and that no one has a tougher life than they do - including myself.
i'm trying to figure out how to tell people what's happening in your life without sounding like you are the only one with a life.
well, i have to go, have to make supper for 5 men for tomorrow night because i have to take two kids to a wedding by myself and then clean a 2000 square foot house that has four sinks that my husband finds a way to shave in every one!! (see, i don't think i'm busy!)